The face.

      So, I went on my first outing to a club. Never having been a part of that scene, I was glad to find out that my friends and I were headed to a gay club, where heterosexual and "grabby" men would not typically thrive (so I hoped). Well, about twenty minutes into our adventure, after we got the "under 21" X's on our hands and inched our way past the bar and to the dance floor, I encountered an unpleasant surprise. A man about half my height, twice my age and three times my width attempted to dance with me. I thought, "Heck, this is awkward for me, and instead of pushing him away and running, I'll try to make this awkward for both of us. From the moment he pulled me in, I made this face and DID NOT STOP:

I, with my exceeding amount of image manipulation skills, attempted to recreate the lighting and overall visual atmosphere (as well as an accurate viewing angle) for the moment this stranger and I shared.

      As I mercilessly glared at him like this, he stood on tip-toe and yelled in my ear, "You're so beautiful." I slightly faltered at this, and said "Thank you?" with a question-like tone. Apparently he wasn't getting the message. So when he raised my hand and backed up insinuating that I twirl or whatever, I started doing the robot. I didn't even stop when he came closer. I just twitched and glitched and shifted mechanically (still with this face, mind you) and slowly began to slide away. I exited his vicinity and then made a run for it. 

And so goes the recreational life of Krista Carpenetti.